Back to the Future

Sometimes I amaze myself. Back in November of 2011 I wrote episode 8, at the end of my post I said "You will never get back the time you wasted worrying about all the time you wasted." No shit eh? This is the beauty of the blog. I do not have to go far for a little inspiration. Alot of my writing is spur of the moment, I get a gut feeling and just go with it. Lost in the confusion, in between the rough edges there is an idea, a beacon of hope to light my way somewhere down the road. I am not sure I realized the value of all of this when I started writing the blog. This archive of my thoughts, a rear view mirror.
To be honest with you I have been struggling a bit lately.  I often get feelings of guilt and remorse for the work I do. I feel I am taking advantage of the earth for my materialistic benefit. I cannot blame anyone for the way things have turned out but myself. I have made poor choices in the past and now I must pay the price, I just seems wrong that in doing so I must destroy something that I have grown to hold very dear to my soul. So in fact it seems I am making a direct attact on myself. It is a conflict in which I would rather not engage.
So what are my options? Two important things I have learned are "the problem is the solution" and "when the student is ready the teacher shall appear."  Ah ha, yes indeed. I am broke but I am not broken.
Life is a crooked path, in permaculture we call that maximizing the edges. Life flourishes at the edges. The more twists and turns in a system, the more edge, the most diversity. In a diverse system you have competition, succession and synergy. Each unit benefits from its predecessor, nothing is wasted. I know that my life is no different. If I follow the principles I will have success and will live a synergistic life within my given environment. I need to understand that there will be conflict along the way, and that I shall use the energy of the conflict to benefit the system, the way a forest fire can rejuvenate an aging ecosystem.
Another part of this permaculture principle is finding value in the marginal. "All those rusted signs we ignore through out our lives, chosing the shiny ones instead", thanks Eddie. It's true though, there is a definitive trend in today's society of devaluing simplicity. Often the answer is staring us straight in the face, if we would only take the time to look in the mirror. The dull and mundane things in life help keep us rooted when all we want to do is fly, often well before our wings have fully developed. This is the time for observation, the interaction will come later once we fully understand how to become a beneficial part of the system.

Sometimes a look back at yourself is all you need for a little guidance. Thanks for coming along for the ride.